Tuesday, December 13, 2005

I'm Dreamin of a White Christmas


Not really. See, the south is not prepared for such things. Not my neck of the woods anyway. I mean, it looks pretty on TV, and if it stays just on the grass, it's pretty here. However, we don't really do snow down here. We get icy rain, sleet, and snow all mixed. It half melts in the day, then at night refreezes to resemble that fondant icing on those fancy cakes these days. Only, make the fondant slicker than whale shit and harder then all get out and you have what we get.

We don't have snowplows, snowmobiles and all that stuff. Heck, we're stupid enough to tie the hood of a car (yall know we keep in the yard for just such a reason) to a bigfoot truck and go if not sledding, then Street Skiing.

The cops watch, the EMT's just wait. *CRASH* Then all sorts of redneck yellin, cussin, and laughing. If its bad, then its praying.

So, if we have a White Christmas, I am gonna turn into the Grinch, hitch poor Zoe to a car hood and we are going to my mama's come hell or high water. Too bad the river don't freeze, then I could just walk across.

I'm a Mean One,

Jenn
Aka
Empress Mey

4 comments:

Karen said...

Now, you know I love the White Christmas, especially if it happens to occur in the week or so before the 25th - giving me a lovely snow day. What you get in the South we also get here, the dreaded 'wintry mix' that can mean a multitude of icky stuff. If it freezes, I get to stay in bed. If it doesn't, then I sludge through the crap to school.

Love the pic of the Galleria Mall -someday I will meet your redneck ass there and teach y'all how to spend, spend, spend!!!

Mary Stella said...

I won't mind White Christmas this year while I visit family and friends. I just don't want it to snow while I'm traveling!

Maureen said...

Lived in the outskirts of atlanta georgia for two years. It was hysterical to us coming from Jersey, that everything shut down for a dusting of snow. but dang them pine trees are scary when they get coated in ice and start leaning precariously close to the house.

Snow is great as long as you can be inside watching it through the window as you're snuggled up before the the fireplace... preferably with a tall dark and handsome.

Mechele Armstrong said...

LOL we just got snow the week before and the panic it can cause is funny. We just don't get it that often and when we do, it goes away quickly. We get a lot of ick too, just got some but got just warm enough to melt it and make cold rain.