Friday, September 29, 2006
You could say I have a form of vampirism, if only literary. And ony if they looked like him..
As a child, I was terrified of vampires, beginning at the tender age of five when I stayed up late and watched Nosferatu on Scifi Theater on my 12 inch black and white. The sight of that thing crawling up the bricks and into the window to bite the neck of the lovely maiden had me huddling under the covers for over a year.
Just about the time I got over that and could sleep with my neck uncovered at night, along came a mini-series called Salem's Lot. Oh, Stephen, thou art the King of plumbing the depths of my psyche. This time the fanged ones were on a bigger screen and in technicolor. That tall green guy was the stuff of a 6 year old's nightmares. I put crosses on my neck.. I don't mean crosses as in a necklace, oh no, you people know me better than that by now. I drew them in magic marker on my neck. When I bathed them off, I drew them again. Thank God it was summer. I still won't watch it now. Though, I will admit, the parts I have seen are no longer as frightening as they once were, the little kid pecking at the window and the dude in the rocking chair with the glowing eyes still give me a big case of the heebs.
Score three for the King.. (1) no open curtains at night (2) no creepy strangers in my house after dark who can't enter without my invite (3) No corn (wait, that's another blog, sorry)
For six years I was terrified of vampires. Then three things happened almost at once.. Two movies Fright Night. (erm. wow) That man was seriously hot and I thought the words in my title for the first, but not the last time. You got it. "Oh yeah baby, bite Me." *sighs*
The other movie? Well, um, I'll admit to having a big old soft spot in my heart for Love at First Bite. George Hamilton may have had to wear clown white pancake makeup, but who cares? The drunkenly uttered line, "Renfield! They thought I vas a black chicken. *hic!*" will forever be next to the final nail in the coffin of my fear of vampires. (pun intended)
What was the death knell of my fear of the undead? Well, one day while I was in spending rainy recess in the library, I noticed a book on the shelf in my highschool library. While jr high kids weren't supposed to be able to check some books out, I was allowed as (a) I was special and (b) I was the librarian's pet. If you check out 10 books a week, this is sort of thing tends to happen *coughs* especially if you bring them all back again. The book was Interview With the Vampire. This opened a whole new world to me, a former fang-o-phobe.
The rest is history.. or
His and Her-story.
From Anne I progressed to..
Laurell K Hamilton-Anita Blake and Jean Claude
Jim Butcher-Dresden Files
Sherry Kenyon-Dark Hunters
MaryJanice Davison-Betsy the Shoe Vamp
Angela Knight-Mageverse and any other vamp she'll write for me (slurp)
Kim Harrison-I love her play on the Clint Eastwood movie titles!!
Charlaine Harris-The Dead as Series
Katie MacAlister-one funny lady
In other words, I'm addicted to fangs.. I love a story with bite. Gimme a good book with a dark broody hero who has a sharp smile, a taste for the red stuff, and an aversion to sunlight, and you've got a fan forever, literally. If you can add a sarcastic wit, some big action scenes and a few twists and turns in there, hey, you've got the makings of a hit television series. If you don't belive me, ask the Buffites who I didn't include because unlike most, I'm not a fan. Please don't stake me.. I liked the original movie better. But Spike would have made a way cool Harry Dresden for Jim Butcher's book to TV series.
So, now you know how one scared little girl made her way to the vampire romance aisle in the bookstore. It's a long and sorted story filled with pain, angst and yes, b-movies. I feel that it was a growing experience, and if it helps one fang-o-phobe come to terms with their fears then I know that I will not have blogged in vein. *winks*
Is that a stake in your pocket or are you happy to see me?
Thursday, September 28, 2006
*Takes a deep breath* If you're in the area, stop by and pay us a visit!
Windows a Bookshop
609 Park Avenue
Monroe LA 71201
Please join us for
Local Authors Day
September 30, 2006
Each author will speak or
read for five minutes; a
book signing will follow.
Sunday, September 24, 2006
What Kind of a Writer Are You?
You're a plotter, someone who carefully crafts an intriguing plot to keep the reader hooked from one scene to the next. You thrive on knowing exactly where your story is going, and what's going to happen along the way. Although you might veer off your original plan for the story, mostly you stick to your carefully planned outline. You're a born storyteller who enjoys sharing your stories with others.
Take this quiz!
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Somehow, I don't see it. Unless you count the characters haunting me day after day in my head as plotting. I do go over scenes over and over again until finally, I put them down.
I guess I'm a plot by the seat of my pants type of writer.
Tomorrow is Monday by the way..
Yeah, I know..ew
Saturday, September 23, 2006
Ok, so we're a matched set. So what?
Let me let you in on a little secret. I despise shopping for real clothes. I work in a place where I get to wear what amounts to jammies. And, while modern scrubs come in cute colors and prints for girls these days, they are still basically the same cut. Yes, that's right, scrubs are pillowcases with arm, leg and head holes. And no, I'm not talkin sheets, GAH!
Well, I have a function that I have to go to where I have to look 'smart' fashionable, and cute. That would be my book signing on the 30th of this month. If I'm going to bomb, I want to look fashionable while doing so.. Not scrub wearing, grubby, like when I go grocery shopping. I'll wear them then, I so don't care. People don't mess with a scrub wearer at the Hell mouth. They know you've been at work all day and are probably at the end of your tether. (more on that at the end)
Mommy and she's mommy when she has to pick out your clothes, not mother, mama or mom...it's MOMMY! I've regressed to being a two-year old. I don't even CARE!--says, sure, sweetie, we shall shop til we drop, and she gets this.. GLEAM in her eye that I can see over the phone.. I can hear it.. it makes a strange sound.. like this MUUUUAAAAAAAAAHHHH!
Factor into it that I'm a big girl.. especially in a certain region of my anatomy.. (They're boobs Ed) and you've got a hissy fit waiting to happen in the racks of a regular store. However, Mommy knows of a store that has mondo kewl clothes as she sees them upon the grand teetons of her co-worker every single day. My mother is observant of the important things, you know. *coughs*
She zooms up in her truck (yes, she's a redneck too!) and kidnaps me and takes me to the store, nice place, reasonably priced and hey, they have a bunch of clothes for women with bazooms.
*Small aside, her hubby calls and says, "Hey, you know what I forgot?" She says, out of the blue.. "The bb gun?" OMG! what in the hell? They're crazy!*
So, I'm in the little cramped hole of a dressing room and she's standing right outside going..
M: Well? *pulling the curtain*
J: Don't open that! I'm nekkid! *jerks the curtain back closed*
M: There's only women here! Chill out!
J: I don't care! Back off! OMG! This shirt looks like something Dolly wore in Best Lil Whorehouse in Texas!
M: It does not.. *snatches the curtain open* finally, she triumphs.. EW!! It does, what the hell? Where did you get those? *points at those in question* I mean, I don't have them!
I'd like to say..as if I've contracted them, like booby VD or something, Jeez! Yes, mother, I caught them in the gym locker room, cause I didn't wear flipflops.. fffth! However, as I'd like to live without the humiliation of having a buttwhippin at the age of thirty *muttermuttermutter* I only say out loud..
J: Harumph! *snatches the curtain back closed* Then I whine cause I have a cute pair of dressy capris with the cuffs, however ,they have that damn freaky button on the inside which I hate, because.. you guessed it, I can't see over the bazooms. *sighs*
M: *taps foot* What are you doing in there? *snatches the curtain open again* Just leave that one undone! I do! You can't see over your bewwbeees! (she sings it, you know)
Then, thank God, she runs off into the store and finds a pair of pants for herself, which show her tiny, nonexistent arse off to full advantage. Yes, that's right Mommy is skinny.. tiny.. petite even!! I'd hate her but she's wonderful.. and she almost got into a fight with two large women who were mocking her when she exclaimed over a pair of pants that she said were, "Gorgeous!"
Ok, she almost got ME into a fight with them. I was innocently cursing buttons in the dressing room. I'd have gotten her back too. I had hangers and I wasn't afraid of using them.
So, I have three, yes, three new outfits.. a pair of dressy capris, denim capris, cute jeans, three tops .. and oh damn.. I forgot shoes..
Close your eyes, Karen.. I'm about to utter the P-word.
I'm bloody well going to Payless, surely they have something that will suit my cheap and tawdry needs. LOL!! Poor Karen, she's been traumatized. Ah well.. She'll like my cute denim capris when she sees them in NOLA next month (yipeee!!), I'm calling em that, not gauchos, DAMMIT!
As to the Hellmouth..
Hubby went to his favorite eatery. He took his food into the store and plunked it down into the cart and hid it under my purse.. *growls* I forgot it was there and walked to health and beauty to get the shampoo, tooth paste etc.
As I did so, I received strange looks and thought, well crap, they can smell these stupid chicken strips.. ew! However, I turn around suddenly and there is this HUGE glowering man behind me.. salivating.
"Why for you take off with my food?" He growls in his deep scary voice. People scatter in the face of Billzilla. He proceeds to treat the trip to the Hellmouth as a picnic. He pushes the buggy up and down the aisles, stuffing his face and throwing things into the buggy while I sip my iced mocha and yes, chill.
I think I'll just give him food on every trip. Sort of like that donkey and carrot trick to make him pull the cart. People moved out of our way because if they got too close, he either glared, or growled. The hubby only gets that way if you come too close to his plate.
In the immortal words of the smartest man on Friends. "Joey don't share food."
Capris, I mean it!
PS: Karen.. PAYLESSSSSS!!!!!
Tuesday, September 19, 2006
Oh, and series sistahs, don't be cutting me off in an abrupt spot either .. you heifers know who yall are.. I still love yall, but seriously, I'm gonna start stalkin me some authors and soon if'n I don't get me some satisfaction. (MaryJanice? yes YOU! Katie? YOU TOO!)
Back to the HEA hullaballooh.. Apparently, people are buying some books, reading them, getting into the good smutty bits, then getting to the end and going.. WHAT THE HEYALL?
Are we going to be reduced to putting Tipper Gore type stickers on books..
Warning: Reader Advisory!! This book may contain a non-satisfactory ending. You might get pissed off. Read at your own risk!
Or in a more positive light..
This book contains a Happy Ending: Birds Sing, Bells Ring, The Whistles Blow and The World Keeps on Turning.
I'm not sure if either one of these is right. I don't actually want to know if it all comes out right in the end. I just want to have a strong belief that it will. I know that most do have a HEA, and the journey between Point A(the beginning) to B (the end) is 99.9% of the fun. However, I'd like to know that Point B isn't going to make me throw the book outside, pour lighter fluid on it, light it up and sacrifice it to the goddess of pissed-off hormonal women. (Oh yeah, she exists and she looks a LOT like me) I'm pretty sure my hubby would like to know this ahead of time too, in case he needs to gather up the garden hose, protective fire gear and yes, the camera.
I love PWP as much as the next perv, but don't label it as romance. Label it as what it is.. good
old fashioned.. SMUUUUUTTT *grins* Loves it I do.. my precious..
This Label Means Nothing
this author is not an expert
she just likes to read alot
she likes happy ever after..
and she'd best see some for Betsy and StinkLAIR.. SOON!
Oh and she'd like her Ainsling/Drake and ooh yes Jim fix too, if atall possible. (puppy eyes)
Saturday, September 16, 2006
Sunday, September 10, 2006
Such is the life of an author. You write, write, write. You type THE END, and you think you're done. Oh no, I'm sorry.. that's the fun part. The icky stuff is just beginning.
Oh, why is that picture of Hugh there? Why the heck not would be the question. Tomorrow is Monday, live a little!
I'm actually ok with edits. You go back and re-read the stuff you did and find out that hey, you did alright. You find the silly mistakes and pick out the dangling participles, fiddle with clauses and ignore MS Word when it says that you've mispelled something. I don't really care if ain't is a word or not, my character is from the South, I'm using it, get over it! Same thing with goin', or gotta. Deal!
The query letter, I can also get over doing, after a few cookies or some major choco-therapy. It's like writing a blurb in the middle of a short business type resume letter. Not too bad on those.
However, the dread synopsis, sucksnotsis, or whatever you wish to call these spawns of Satan that were put upon the earth to torment me are a different story entirely. I hate them, I despise them and I will NEVER like them as long as I live so help me NORA! Some write them before they do their stories. Some plot out their stories. I don't do this.. I've tried and I can't.. it does something to switch off the creative process in my brain, makes writing like homework and we all know how I felt about school.
I did well in school, but hated every single minute they forced me to stay. I felt trapped in that regimented, plodding little classroom. Even the desks confined me. I bumped my knees on the tops, or banged my ankles on the legs. Forced to sit wait on the other children while they asked questions over and over and over.. just give me the test so I can leave! *sighs*
I went to a technical college after I quit 'real' college *grins* and I was never so happy to hear the following phrase. "We work at our own pace here." I finished three different courses of study in 8 short months. They handed me my certificates and just sort of stared at me like I was an alien, or even worse.. a yankee *gasps* LOL!!
So, my goal this week is to do the dread synopsis..
Live Long and Prosper,
Wednesday, September 06, 2006
Remy (Inspired by the image on the left oooh) and Lola have been sort of a fast and yes, HOT bit of fun for me. What Happens in Vegas sort of flowed out.. so Whoohoo! I love them! Funny, hot and yes, soo very sweet. Short of some edits, we're done!!!!
Thanks, Write 50 Books, yall helped me soo soo much!
As for this story? JMorgan made me do it! For real! Like a vulture looming over me. Nothing like a deadline and a new writing loop to make you get busy! I've had a little help with this one and I hope it's as good as I think it is!
Cross your fingers that my writing stream helps to get all my other stuff out and to my editor. Dateless sat on the back burning glaring at me. And Gabby has been wacking me with her little rattle. I know,I've been peeved too, honey! Now onto her after some edits and other things and, I'll be keeping my fingers crossed on that too!!
Here's to Humpday and I hope you're all having a great week!!
Her Name was Lola!!
Ooh I'm not gonna singit!
La la la la la
Monday, September 04, 2006
Coffee's not just for drinking anymore. I'm in the spotlight and while it shines on me, I'm also sharing a little about myself, including one of my embarrassing moments. A moment my hubby still teases me about. (you can click on the banner for my Limelight page, I got skills now.. ffth!)
If you'd like to see read my coffee blog you can go here
And for my embarrassments and other stuff go here
Coffee Thoughts with Jenna
Feel free to comment and yes, tease me about it. I don't care. But like someone once said, tease an author and end up in her next book. Who said that? Oh, I dunno maybe her name was.. Lori, Nee, Meme, Karen, Kitta, Livvy or.. well, you just never know.
I'm a big believer in taking inspiration from every day life. It gives your book a touch of realism that it can lack otherwise. I don't mean to just write your autobiography, because if you're like me, you're boring!
Heck, that's why I write, to have a life, at least in 12pt Times New Roman font. I can kill, maim, and have lots of hot.. er, well, anyhoo. Also, I'm not in danger like my heroine who's dangling 20ft above a raging river by her fingertips, or having my heart broken by a total cad. Or being shot out of a cannon, or .. well, you get the picture. Writers have a wonderful passport into the lives of their characters.
You can have a little peek into mine if you'd like. But hey, don't expect the life and times of Jenna Leigh to be all that exciting and wild. I'm just a woman that lives in a tiny little town with her hubby, teenaged daughter and demented cat, who by the way, just accidentally got hair remover on him by brushing up against my daughter's legs.
Oh crap, I'm the owner of half a Mr. Bigglesworth. *sighs* Did I say boring? I meant INSANE!!
Come on back here Mr. Bean! You'd best be glad we live in the South or you'd be freezing your butt off by now! Oh dear, he's wet and mad now. You realize he's just turned into the EFO (Evil Feline Overlord) I'll be hearin' about this for the next decade. No amount of kitty treats, and begging will make it up to him.
I only hope he knows I am not to blame. I don't want to wake up without parts I need to function in polite society. *blinks and looks under the desk* Ok, I have to go now. I've been informed by the feline lord and master that all privileges have forthwith been removed until further notice.
See yall later,
Wait a damn minute since when do I let a cat dictate to me? I'll stay on here as long as I wa...
Saturday, September 02, 2006
What do you do when your muse says..
That isn't right you know. You need to change it to something else. Here.. just let me do it, honey. Go on shoo, go and do the dishes or something. *cracking of Muse knuckles*
When you come back, your WIP resembles nothing like you left it as. My story started out as a paranormal romantic comedy involving a woman that was a Pantherwere but didn't know it until she met up with another one who sort of woke her up to the truth. But then, it all shifted into this zany, goofy, and if you must know, much better story of a woman who just wants to be something a little less boring. Be careful what you wish for Lola, honey, you just may get more than you bargained for. Dammit, don't you hate it when the muse is right? She gets all smug with me and sniggers in my head.
It makes me want to smack her. I know she's stealing my chocolate too, you know. That heifer has been in my emergency rations snacking late at night, typing on my keyboard and leaving trails of aluminum foil wrappers beneath my chair. The cat loves it too. He bats them back and forth across the floor with the abandon of a cat half his age. The twit. She's winning him over to her side. Very soon, she'll learn to open the cat food cans and he'll no longer need me at all. I'll be assassinated in the night, you just wait!!
Back to my story, if it is still mine. These things have a way of getting away from me, and growing into something all on their own.
Lola is out on the town with her two insane friends, twins, Mia and Tia, who've dared her to do something out of her ordinary. She's agreed and now she's netted a total stud named Remy Fontenot, who's in town for his first vacation in five years. Remy's sure Lola is up to something, but as long as he gets in on the action, he could care less. However, Lola's mother has skeletons she wants to stay in the closet and when she makes a fateful phone call, her past comes back not to haunt her, but Lola in the form of a very eccentric family that she didn't even know she had. A midnight ride in a Concord later and it's culture shock for a woman who firmly believed that What happens in Vegas....
Well, you know the rest.
Ok, so you don't but if I told you, that would so spoil the end, right?
Love ya, happy Labor Day
Muah or is it muahahaha?