Monday, March 13, 2006

My new job.



Oh, not the author gig, that's going great! However, I have a new job as the technical advisor/publicist/secretary/etc to the great(and if he doesn't watch it, late) J. Morgan, also an author.

How did I luck out and get this highly sought after position you ask? Well, I signed a contract with this great personage about 8 years ago and it's now coming to fruition that the above jobs are also entailed wherein, hidden until such time that I could be guilted into doing them.

Am I angry? Let me clue you in, if I use large words, that in no way portray my origins, roots, or regional dialect, you can bet your sweet ass I am. *blinks* Oopsie!

Yeah, I married the man, now where in the crap in our non-existent prenup does it state that I have to do all his publication work for him? In no paragraph, line, addendum, or even written in magic marker on the back of the marriage contract do I see this. I know, as I looked. I'm quite tempted to shake it in his face before I do other things with it much more violent and bloody and yes, illegal.

No doubt he appreciates it as he tells me so, with that look on his face. Big blue green eyes shining at me as he sincerely tells me that I am the most wonderful person in the world to do email this, or join that. It doesn't stop me from gnashing my teeth, however, it does prevent me from gnawing on one of his appendages in ways he would NOT enjoy.

I want to know why, where, when and how the hell I got elected to do this. I want to know how come he can't learn to do this for himself. I learned it, he is smart, a genius if you must know. HE can do it, or I shall know the reason why.

Death.. by... marriage AUGH!

Jenn

4 comments:

Karen said...

Aww, but just think how cute ol' J. Morgan will look in his pirate costume. I bet he will let you see his mighty cutlass if you are a good lil publicist.

Anonymous said...

Oh shut UP! Cutlass pah! he can walk the plank after he swabs MY DECK.. moohaahha

Mary Stella said...

You got elected the first time you agreed to do any of the tasks. *grinning and ducking*

Jenn said...

Err.. learning like me, Deb, dear. He can do it, he'll have to. Or else bribe evil teen queen dream machine into it.. LOL